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Aug
10th
Mon
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I found my broom!

"We made somewhat of a statement that this is what we got and we are coming at you," said Yankees reliever Phil Coke, who surrendered Martinez’s two-run homer, stopping a 31-inning scoreless streak by New England’s Dead Bat Society and giving the visitors a brief 2-1 lead." -NY Post


Digs and jabs such as the above are insanely appropriate after the Yankees swept the Red Sox this weekend, putting them 6.5 games ahead in the AL East. I was fortunate enough to be a part of the raucous crowd at the Stadium last night, where “Boston sucks” cheers were frequent and dozens of revelers got escorted out by cops.

"A Red Sox lineup that couldn’t score in a brothel with a fistful of hundreds had done just enough to win thanks to Victor Martinez’s eighth-inning homer…" Hee hee hee.

After a solo shot by A-Rod, back-to-back homers by Damon and Tex (courtesy of relief pitcher Daniel Bard), there was no way Yankee fans were leaving the Bronx disappointed. To add a little extra insurance, Swish smacked a single off of Hideki Okajima to ink two addiitonal runs.

Starting pitcher Andy Pettitte pitched a scoreless seven innings and BoSox pitcher Jon Lester only allowed A-Rod’s bomb, so the matchup was very even. The rest was not.

Privileged to be with two Red Sox fans, one of them decided to start s*** on the downtown 4 train with a bunch of drunk Yankee fans, which we all know is not a smart idea. The Yankees host Toronto at home this week and the Tigers are visiting Fenway. Let the games continue…

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Jul
22nd
Wed
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Wednesday Weirdness

New York Mets Vice President of Player Development, Tony Bernazard, challenged AA Binghamton players to a fight after a post-game implosion. So the team was 1 - 6 in early July and there are allegations of underage drinking by team members. Does that give you justification to rip your shirt off and challenge some dudes to a duel?

The Yankees are in sole possession of first place after being written off earlier in the season. That’s all I’ll say about that, for fear of the jinx.

A Mixed Martial Arts (MMA) fighter read on multiple websites that he had died of a heart attack. Unless he had a clone, not so much.

NFL commish Roger Goodell is going to look into sex assault allegations against Ben Roethlisberger; “bombshell allegations,” according to the New York Daily News. Either the chick is desperate for cash or the QB was desperate for a little bit of something else.

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Jul
21st
Tue
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Hide Your Puppies!

After 18 months of being locked in the Leavenworth clink and two months of home confinement, Michael Vick is a free man. Indicted on federal dogfighting conspiracy charges back in 2007, Vick was suspended from the NFL indefinitely. He will now go back to NFL commish Roger Goodell and beg for mercy, as he wants to come back and play for any team that will take him. Thankfully, my Giants have no interest. Maybe whoever decides to sign has-been, retired-99-times Brett Favre will take him in as well…

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Jul
16th
Thu
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Break’s Over.

A lot has happened in the 11 weeks since I last wrote. My alcohol tolerance is near zero, after a bad weekend following my last post, I no longer take shots, the Penguins won the Stanley Cup, the Lakers won the NBA Finals, Roger Federer won Wimbledon and so on and so forth.

Today, baseball enters the second half of the season. The Mets SUCK, the Nats are worse, the Yankees are three games back, Pedro is now a Phillie, Manny is back from a 50-game suspension for juicing…

After an awful first half of the season, the Nats fired manager Manny Acta and replaced him with Washington native Jim Riggleman. With a 26-61 record, this young team needs a swift kick in the a** and hopefully this guy can do it. They have a great ballpark. They just need a great team to go with it.

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Apr
24th
Fri
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Time for flips! Happy Friday. :)

Time for flips! Happy Friday. :)

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Apr
21st
Tue
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Two-fer-Tuesday.

I know you missed two-fer-Tuesday!

Well into the first round of NHL playoffs, we have a few great series going on and a few that may/may not seem hopeless at this point.

Boston took another game against the Canadians (who are without their star) to lead the series 3-0. In fact, on Patriots Day (i.e. all Massholes get the day off while everyone else has to work and use it as an excuse to tailgate along the marathon route), ALL Boston teams won.

After trailing 2-0 to the Rangers, the Caps pulled it together and shut out the Rangers 4-0. The Caps goalie, 20 year-old Simeon Varlamov, saved 33 out of 33 shots on goal, in the mother of all venues, Madison Square Garden.

The Devils are up 2-1 against the Carolina Hurricanes; the 2009 Battle of Pennsylvania is currently being won by the Penguins; up 2-1, the Anaheim Ducks lead the San Jose Sharks 2-0 (quack, quack, quack); the bright spot in Michigan is that the Red Wings lead the Blue Jackets 2-0, St. Louis fans are going to be a little more blue if they lose one more game to the Canucks, up 3-0; and the Flames are still burning in Calgary, trailing Chicago 2-1.

Switching gears. I mention quite often what a hot mess the Washington Nationals are. I admire the loyal fans, the season ticket holders who spend thousands of dollars to watch their team lose. Get a load of this:

Someone at Majestic Athletic was taking a snooze while manufacturing Adam Dunn’s and Ryan Zimmerman’s jerseys.

Nationals: N-A-T-I-O-N-A-L-S. Nationals.

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Apr
20th
Mon
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Would you rather…

Get blown out 22-4 OR go 2-13 with runners in scoring position (aka RISP) and lose 4-2?

This is the latest MLB debate in the great city of New York. The Yankees, who were thankfully able to pull out a win yesterday, allowed 14 runs in the second inning on Saturday. I’m glad I didn’t waste the 75-degree day watching that misery. Pitcher Chien-Ming Wang, who was responsible for the second-inning massacre is 0-3 on the season with a 34.50 ERA (or earned run average). Even Mets fans who HATE the Yankees just pity the guy. Woe is him is right.

The Mets, sending their fans into a frenzy of anxiety and it’s not even May, are .236 with RISP on the season. Manager Jerry Manuel said, “We just haven’t clicked yet with runners in scoring position — and we will. We have too many good hitters.” Uhhhhh…hmmm..thanks for the useless explanation. I had my first playdate at Citi Field yesterday. We left our seats when the score was 3-2. We barely made it to the bathroom and the Brewers snuck in another run. Really?

Some say if you are going to lose, you might as well lose fair and square. Others say you at least need to put up a good fight if you’re gonna lose. Something to ponder on this rainy Monday…

(In other news, the worst team in the Major Leagues, the Nationals led the best team, the Marlins in every single game this weekend. They lost all three. I challenge the Nats to hold a lead in one game this week (ahem, bullpen) and actually win. Let’s re-visit over the weekend.)

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Apr
16th
Thu
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My bad. Jody Gerut hit a solo shot on the SECOND pitch of the game at Citi Field’s home opener, not the first. Apologies to all.

My bad. Jody Gerut hit a solo shot on the SECOND pitch of the game at Citi Field’s home opener, not the first. Apologies to all.

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"That’s a Kick in the Pants."

Quoted by one of my favs regarding the latest news that Boston Celtics Center Kevin Garnett (known as KG) may NOT be available for the playoffs, due to a nagging knee injury. OUCH! Literally and figuratively.

KG injured the knee two months ago, missed 13 games and hasn’t been the same since.

The Celtics won the NBA championship in 2008 and finished this season 62-20. They will begin the postseason on Saturday against the Chicago Bulls. I guess KG will have to exercise his pre-game rituals and then ride the pine pony. :(

In other “OMG” news, Yankees RF Xavier Nady is headed for the Disabled List (DL) with an elbow injury. According to skipper Joe Girardi, Nady’s MRI results were…not good. Thanks, Joe, for using your extended vocabulary.

The Rangers took Game 1 over the Capitals. The Caps were the only Washington team I ever cheered for, so I feel a loyalty to them, but…NYC is my ‘hood. Hmmm…I plead the 5th.

NHL Playoffs, Round 1, Night two begin tonight. You can catch the Detroit Red Wings/Columbus Blue Jackets (do people actually say Hi, I’m a Blue Jackets fan??) on my new favorite channel, Versus. Heh heh.

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Apr
15th
Wed
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Faceoff.

The 2009 Stanley Cup Playoffs kick off tonight. To some, this is the most exciting time of the years. To others, it’s a head scratcher. Stanley Cup? Is that what I drink my Miller Lite out of while watching the (insert favorite baseball team here) game?

NHL playoffs are the true test of who can rock it on the ice, who can come trhough in the clutch and who chokes under pressure.

Eastern Conference 1st round matchups:

Montreal Canadians vs. Boston Bruins: Canadians defensemen Andrei Markov is out with an injury and will probably not play. Could be a blow to their chances to advance.

Washington Capitals vs. New York Rangers: Keys to the game—Caps goalie Jose Theodore and offenseman Alex Ovechkin. And the Rangers offense—will they show up?

New Jersey Devils vs. Carolina Hurricanes: Marty Brodeur rocks. Ummm…that’s all I know about either of these teams. Sorry.

Philadelphia Flyers vs. Pittsburgh Penguins: I’d like to see a Ovechkin vs. Crosby matchup down the road…

New thing I learned this year: The NHL has its own channel! Kinda. http://www.versus.com/nhl. It’s hidden somewhere in the 100s on Time Warner.

I refuse to take any blame for making predictions, so I’m just not. Use your imagination, friends!

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